Brew:28 The Eskimo is a Faerie

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Starring: James, Brick, Becca, with Underscore
Guest Starring: Dion and Servius; Malcolm Green; Inuit-ion; Ainé; Peter File
Challenge: Tessa Doom and King Augustus Le Mort; Stealing back stage passes; Inuit-ion the eskimo ex-pro wrestler
Location: Facemart Stadium
Date Played: 20 Jan 2013

Sign on the dotted line

🎲 DM: James renewed his contract with Popeye for a decade (in Earth years). Popeye gets four weeks of vacation, one phone call per week on a Trac phone.

Tour Buses Along Forbes Avenue

Underscore: We were hanging at Brewed Awakening exchanging pleasantries before the night of the concert when all these tour busses pulled up and roadies started pouring out_ They obviously had no taste or they would have imbibed themselves at Brewed Awakening_ So Brick went out to see what the fuss was all about and he met this one eskimo roadie who used to be a wrestler in this duo called Inuit-ion_ But wrestling is fake anyway so who cares_ The group was looking for someone wearing a super magical necklace made of unicorn bone and they found out that the grandiloquent dude was either the eskimo wrestler, the manager for the tour, or the drummer for the opener, Rhetorical Hydrogen, at the concert_

Brick: Hey, yo! I hit up Brewed with the guys & the place is packed! It takes a while to get my cup o' joe, but it's worth the wait. I join up with everyone, & we see buses file in. People pour out, & Becca says we might be able to find out who the Winter Knight is by looking around these roadies.

I head to the Achilles Meal because I figure, if I'm gonna be looking around, I may as well have something to eat.

I stop & take a step back... In front of me is one of my favorite wrestlers: Intuition (AKA Neil Hankerson)!

I stop & say hi. Man, the guys super-nice!

No one seems to have the necklace so I go meet the guys.

James: Boy howdy, I love concerts. LOVE 'EM. Did I ever tell you 'bout the one time I roadied for a Pantera show back in Texas? Chicks kept coming up to me asking for autographs, I guess I look like the drummer. I dunno, I don't see it.

I have to, um, turn my football into the coach's office

Underscore: We decided to try and get into the offices at the stadium, where the Katstar crew had set up_ So first we had Brick get past the dood guarding the door to the offices by telling him that he needed to return his uberfootball to the coach’s office, then we had James turn us invisible_ James invisibled me and Becca but then he was utter fail on invisibling himself_ So while James stuck around outside we had Brick open the door to the offices so we could come on in_ Inside we saw the manager (But no necklace!) on the phone and on the table this leet stack of back stage passes_ I took the initiative and snuck around the dude to give myself a discount, but then Becca had to be a fool and tried to do the same thing_ We bumped into each other and backstage passes went everywhere, so we both flightily absconded out of there_

Brick: We head into the concert, and Becca says that we need to get into the backroom to see if we can find the Winter Knight when we find out the managers are in the coach's offices. I tell the others that I'll make an excuse to get in. Then they can sneak in behind me all invisible like.

We agree to the plan. Luckily, the guard is one of the guys that I know on the baseball team. I tell him I need to drop off my football so I head inside & hold the door open for a second while the others get inside. I wait back as the others search.

After a few minutes, I hear yelling & see flying name tags so I decide it's time to book it. I drop my football into one of the cubicles & walk out. The others can find their own way out...

Becca: Wow, do I have to do everything? Brick, think, we need back stage, you have a reason to get back stage. Brick, look, I know you don't need to turn in the ball but we need to get backstage. Brick, stay with us, you may need to tell a little false hood. Wow just like talking to a Brick.

James: I guess I'm better at making other folks invisible than myself. I really need to practice, that shit could come in handy.

Hot Tub of Love

Underscore: We managed to get out with some backstage passes, though, and when we went to use them at the visitor’s locker room they didn’t question a thing_ So we get in the back and who do we find? It’s the eskimo roadie naked in the hot tub with some extravagant ladies_ Brick uses the chance to ask him about the winter knight, and the roadie rages out_ At this point I realize with my incredible knowledge that the eskimo is in fact an ogre_ After a rumble, the eskimo was lights out, and we absconded to the other backstage area, the home locker room, where Katstar and the opening band kept most of their stuff_

Brick: When we meet up again, they have some backstage passes. We head back stage. We go through the home team locker rooms & Neal's there with some hoyty toyty dude that knows James.

Neal's in a hottub with some babes & asks if we want to join in. I agree. The others don't seem up to it. We talk for a second, & I mention the Winter Knight. That sets the guy off! He tells us not to talk about him, but the moods already killed so I get out of the tub, & he attacks me. We take the guy down & head to the backstage area.

Becca: Just one thing GROSS

James: What's a hot tub scene without Dion, and a gnarly wet brawl?

Backstage

🎲 DM: Intro band is Rhetorical Hydrogen.

Underscore: So in the home locker room, Brick gets pulled away to see Katstar herself while the rest of us are stuck. We stealth in and loot the Rhetorical Hydrogen room, where we find the amulet hidden in a subwoofer_ Mission Accomplished_ We grabbed Brick and got out of there before anyone got suspicious_

Brick: We get backstage & there's a buffet spread out so I start eating while the others decide what to do. A guy comes up to me & tells me that KatStar wants to talk to me! The others don't look like they'll need me for a little bit so I go with the guy to see KatStar...

James: Major score! We actually find the exact object we went looking for. AMULET GET!

Returning the Amulet to Ainé

Brick: ...I get out of KatStar's room just as the others leave the opening band's room.

They have the amulet! We call Lord Mecca to find out where Ainé is so we take it to her. She thanks us & then everything starts going black...

James: Brick and Aine make a cute couple. I don't trust it one bit. I feel we have played right into her hands...zzzzzzzz...

🎲 DM: Ainé will invite the cast to watch the festivities. As she waves her hand you see that the stage is in chaos. Three burka-clad warriors with katanas are attacking the bands drummer, who seems to be holding his own against them, but is wearing down. The rest of the band is nervously playing from the side of the stage. The crowd is going wild for the stage show.

"It would appear that the council has taken the bait, and goes after this Winter Knight. Live or die as a result of this assault by the Guard, he will not be in a position to influence what is to come. I thank you for returning to me my amulet and our debt on that matter may be concluded."

Ainé gets up and starts to walk away, "They are yours now to do with as you wish." As she says this your vision begins to black out and the last thing you see is her...